I lost a friend today. She suffered from depression among other things. I didn't know she was being bullied. Yes, a grown man/woman can be bullied. I don't understand the cruelty. I don't know anyone who deserves it.
Bullying doesn't make you good or strong. Being kind makes you strong. Loving someone despite their faults makes you strong. Being a friend to someone with depression or being bullied can be hard, but you're helping them as well as yourself. No one should feel that killing themselves is the only way out. Depression is an evil creature that sits on your shoulder and tells you lies. Bullies are like that as well.
Here's basically what I wrote on my Facebook:
This isn't the first time I've woken up to find someone I care about has died via social media, or by their own hand. Usually, I'd just turn off my phone and cry myself back to sleep. I'm not good with this stuff and that's my way of dealing. Pats on the back make it worse to me. Everyone grieves differently and I don't need to be told how to. I'm crying and shaking right now but I want to say something...
But I met Lara & a bunch of other awesome ladies through social media a few years ago via our love for Cassandra Clare's books & movie, and a certain actor/singer Jamie from the band now called Counterfeit. These ladies are all different, live in different countries & states, and are all sweet and amazing. They're friends even if we've never met in person. I love my friends and maybe attach to them more than they would attach to me. I try to be encouraging to all of them and can be a fierce protector. I was hoping someday I would meet a few if not all of them. Now their won't be the chance to meet her.
Lara and I had some conversations about her life & mine. They could get dark. She even told me to come up there if I needed a place to live. But I'm sure it would have taken a bit of paperwork or at least a passport to visit. Haha. But that's the kind of people I have in my life. I may not talk to them all the time but they're there when I need them. I know we'd talked when things had gotten really bad. I'd once even asked the other girls to check in on her. Now she had her makeup job and the kitty and I'm not sure what happened. I don't know why this happened. Why she didn't message me or someone else to talk. But that's how depression works. That's how bullying works. Love you Lara...I hope now you're at peace...
**For anyone reading this. Talk to someone. Call a hotline. Know that there are other ways to deal things. People who will listen to you and understand what you’re going through. Don’t lose hope.